Happy Hubby House Rules Explained- Rule 5

Learn to follow your hubby's lead physically.

I promise to treat this topic discreetly. It will probably have a PG/ PG-13 rating, though.

We know that men are visually attracted, right? I mean, simply look at the clothing that male designers make. This should be a given. Think about it, how did you dress when your hubby dated you? Do you still dress that way? Do you even try? Truly?

I have  a theory about it. It hasn't failed yet, though anything is possible. Ask your hubby what his favorite sports car is. It has to be a sports car. Not a truck or a sedan. A SPORTS car. My hubby's is a '76-'78 Corvette Stingray T-top.

Photo Credit

 

 

Here's me:

 

 

 

Not a ton of curves on either of us, but long thin lines. It's similar. I am not as slim now as I was when we married, but I try to be weight conscious and am still within 30 pounds of when we married. Working on being 20. The same theory has worked with every lady I have asked. Dodge Chargers usually go with a bigger boned lady; a Mustang goes with a girl with an athletic build. But it has to be a SPORTS CAR. If his answer is a truck, don't be offended!! Ask for his favorite sports car!!

 

All that to say, God made men VISUAL!! Have you done anything lately to visually please your hubby?

 

If he loves your hair, have you done something to make it look specially nice for him recently? Not for church. Not for going out. For him!!

 

Have you gotten out of your jammies this week? While you were at home all day?

 

Have you worn his favorite outfit lately?

 

Have you checked your underclothing drawer lately? Do they make you feel distinctly feminine? If not, go buy something that does! No one sees them but you... and HIM!! Buy some that you love. It doesn't have to be super expensive. You can go through the self- checkout at Walmart if that makes you feel better. Get SOMETHING!! He'll appreciate it.

 

The flip side of your husband being attracted to you physically is every other man. When you dress for your husband, be sure HE is the ONLY one that gets to enjoy ALL you are made of. When you dress to go out, if your husband says it's too much, it means he doesn't want every man in town to see "his" property. By "property" I mean there are parts of you that only your husband should fully understand and know. If your clothing is tight enough/ low enough/ high enough/ see-through enough to leave little to the imagination, or less to the imagination, you are really dishonoring your husband. After all, doesn't God's Word say, "The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband..." (I Corinthians 7:4)? Listen to your husband. Even if you wear a sack dress to please him, HE WILL BE PLEASED!! And didn't you pick HIM out of the millions of men in the world?

 

And just because he's visual doesn't mean he doesn't need to be touched. When did you last greet him with a kiss? When did you last touch his arm as you walked by? When did you last sit beside him just to watch a movie?  or read? or watch his favorite sports team? I crochet while my hubby watches. Then, when he gets excited, I look up to watch the replay. :)

 

What about your words? When did you last tell him "I love you" for just because? When did you last admire his muscles? Ask him if he lost weight? Compliment him on his outfit, or the way his outfit compliments his eyes/ shows off the weight he lost/ looks awesome on him?

 

What about your weight? (OK, I am preaching to myself here most of all. I need to get going!!) Do you do some form of exercise? Even if you have little time, pushing the stroller outside for thirty minutes is better than nothing!! Do you watch what you eat? (and not just as you put it into your mouth :)) Eat what you need, watch the rest! It may seem easy for me to talk about these things, and heaven knows I have been blessed there. First, YOUR HUSBAND MARRIED YOU!! No one else!! He loves you as you are now. That being said, we all can TRY for more. And second, I gained twenty pounds in two years. I am slowly working to lose them again. For now, I try not to complain and to do the things I know I CAN do!

 

I guess I'm saying, "Make it about HIM!" How you dress, how you style your hair, how you buy ALL your clothes, how you speak, how you touch him. SHOW him!! TELL him!!!

 

Yes, he is COMMANDED to love you!! But do you really want him to have to seek God's help to make it possible?? Be lovely for him!! From the inside, out.





So Sorry

I'm sorry for being absent for so much of the month of September. I finally have internet at home, and am going to be far more faithful from here on out. Thanks to my two readers for their patience with me. :)

Happy Hubby House Rules Explained- Rule 4

Train Your Children

Do you enjoy your children? Or are they frustrating? My heart breaks for the moms who enjoy more the times when they are NOT interacting with their children. I thoroughly enjoy my sons!! (I am not partial, God only gave me three boys.) I am with my boys every hour of every day except one shopping & errand trip every other Thursday or Friday and an occasional date night. I also homeschool. My boys are my life.

So how do I get anything done? How do I get my house clean? Here's my method. Some have done things with their children sooner than me, others later. This is not Bible doctrine. It is simply suggestion. Something to help you with your children. For those whose children do more than mine, feel free to leave suggestions!

Ok, back on track:

1) Be sure your children KNOW you love them. Jeremiah 31:3 says, "... Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore, with lovingkindness have I drawn thee." God Himself draws us in love! Think of your school teachers. Who was your favorite? My favorite was my fifth grade teacher, Mrs. Hutchinson. Why? Because there was far more praise and approval than there was rebuke.
      When in the business world, they tell you to administer criticism this way: praise-- criticism-- second praise. Our children are eternal souls!! We point them toward eternity with our words. We form their lives with our praise and criticisms. Do we "draw" them to ourselves the way the Lord draws us to Himself? This step is the most vitally important! Think of it! The Lord dedicated all of I Corinthians 13 to the importance of this truth!! Without this step, the rest of what I say is nothing. As a matter of fact, the rest of these without love simply breed resentment.

2) Teach your children to work. The book of Proverbs is FULL of truths about the slothful. God made mankind to work. BEFORE the fall, they were to keep the garden. Without a job to do, people begin to fuss and backbite.
      So, here's what I did:

• As soon as they could take a toy out of a bucket, it was time to teach them to put it back. It was a game. They had no idea they were learning to work. Until they were around three or four, I assisted in cleanup to keep their minds focused.
• When they could walk, they put their dirty clothes in the laundry basket and their diapers in the trashcan.
• When they were two, they began to drag their laundry basket to the washing machine and dumping it out
• Around two (when they were tall enough) they began  to clear their plate, cup, and utensils from the table
• Around two and a half, they began to help set the table. I now have three kids, so each gets one thing: cup/ plate/ fork. (Sidenote: I put all cups and plates in the bottom cabinets. Pots and casserole dishes go high. Why? so my children can be part of our family "team.")
• When they could sit, they were sitting on a counter, playing in the water to "help" wash or rinse the dishes. But at three, they began to help put the dishes away. They now share the responsibility of emptying the dishwasher after breakfast every morning.
• Around 3 1/2 they learned how to fold clothes. Starting with washcloths. I helped until they did them right. If they do it wrong at 3 1/2, they will do it wrong at 13.
• As soon as they could, they dressed themselves. I do not pick outfits except for church services. Oh, and family pics. Yes, plaid and cammo is sometimes worn. Who cares? They feel accomplished, I saved time, and it makes great blackmail during the teen years. :)
• At six, they began putting their clothes away. By then, they could fold all their own. I helped them put the clothes for a couple weeks, to get them used to where everything went. Then, if it was not put away properly (after a good warning) I dumped the whole drawer out and they had to fold it up and try again.
• My oldest just turned nine. Since 8 1/2 he has started the washer and dryer. Now he washes, folds, and puts away his own clothes.
• Because of moves and crazy homelife, we are just now teaching all three boys how to make their own beds. Next on the agenda is to teach my nine year old how to cook on his own instead of just helping mommy.

      Why? Why do my children do these? For now, because it helps them to feel part of a team. But really? Because I am working myself out of a job. I have NO DESIRE to be a mom that washes and irons and cleans after my teenager. Let alone my college student.

3) Train them to obey. Proverbs 22:6 says, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it." Make that verse say what you will, I believe my GOD. Deuteronomy tells us to teach them "line upon line, precept upon precept."

• Since I started from day one, I taught them to lay still while I changed their diaper. I only said, "Straight leg" while I held their leg still with my arm and fastened that side of their diaper. I never had trouble changing them.
• First thing to teach them is "no." No means stop. No means look at Mommy to see what's next. Teaching them this in the crawling stage makes walking a breeze.
• Paci? For mine, I confined the paci to the crib at one year old. They were a "big boy" now. They could sit in the crib all day with their paci. But to get out, they had to surrender it. Then, to move from the crib to the toddler "big boy" bed, the paci stayed with the crib. They could sleep in the "big boy" bed, but could not bring the paci. When they woke in the night, I put them back in the crib with the paci. Mo oldest took a week to choose the bed over the paci. My second, three days. My third, zero. Easiest job ever!!
• We have three major house rules. They cover a multitude of sins.
• If it's not yours, and you don't ask, dont touch it.
• Obey right away with the right attitude.
• Ask first.

My hubby enjoys our children. I am not perfect. I am not always consistent. My youngest had a HUGE problem with anger until I figured out suggestion number one: LOVE. But I LOVE being around my boys. Other people like my boys.

Train them!! It brings peace to your home.